BYU or University of Utah for daughter?

[Billinsd]

Thanks everyone, I sincerely appreciate it!!

I've gotten an epiphany!! My daughter is an extremely hard working, serious kid who is pretty smart, and very logical. She absolutely needs to let her hair down and chill out. She'd like to go to parties and meet boys too. That's fine with the wife and me, so long as she doesn't lose control. She likes to ski and loves the ocean. Most of her studious girlfriends will go to the beach with her and pull out a book. She jumps into the waves with her surfboard and is bumed her friend is reading a book and doesn't want to come out with her.
She's got a tiny shot at elite schools like Stanford. However, I think those schools could be too much pressure, which is unacceptable. She wouldn't be happy at a school with mostly lax students either. Honestly, I think she'd be most happy at UC Irvine, which is a tough school. UC Irvine she likes the best. I know LOTS of parents whose kids have gone there and they have only good things to say. My concern with it, would be the pressure, it could be too much. On the other hand Stanford is a FANTASTIC college and seems like she would like it there. Classes are smaller and she'd get more attention. The concern is that it's too much pressure?

 

[texag10]

I think your last post is a good move in the right direction. The culture at a college will definitely play a role in shaping the students, but just because a place is affiliated with a religion doesn't mean the overall culture is what you'd like or there aren't easily accessible subcultures.

Some cases in point:

-One of my high school friends went to Baylor. Baptist affiliated. He fell into the party scene quickly and had to be bailed out of jail one morning by his parents. Luckily that set him straight. I think most are aware of the way Baylor handled sexual assault allegations against members of their football team.

-I went to Texas A&M, known to be a much more conservative school than most public universities. It is big, there were parties and drugs easily available.

-My ex wife went to ACU, affiliated with Church of Christ, it had curfews, prohibition on students being at local bars, etc. Come to find out her supposed faith didn't mean shit to her, she cheated on me, lied about ending the affair and wanting to work on restoring our marriage, and tried to get as much money as possible on her way out.

-A close friend had a very similar situation, also at ACU, only his was a fiancee so he got out with a much lower dollar cost.

I guess my point is your daughter will determine who she wants to be, and she will fall in with crowds that fit that identity.

 

[fencesitter]

It sounds like you've received your answer given the epiphany, but it would have been interesting to hear from somebody who isn't a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, who attended BYU.... Lots of opinions from folks that haven't been there done that. Perhaps, we should ask Ty Detmer to join the forum, but he has since converted, which very well may have happened while he attended BYU. I personally applied but didn't get accepted into BYU's finance program. I ended up at the University of Utah, and was very satisfied with Utah's program.

Utah is a great place... I've lived in Colorado, for the past 17+ years, and there are A LOT of things that I miss about Utah, but those things are primarily centered around recreation (not education). I certainly prefer the hunting opportunities that CO has to offer, but given that I slant toward archery, those opportunities are only plentiful for a couple of months out of the year. For the other 9-10 months of the year, Utah is quite enticing: Way more water sport opportunities, given a multitude of lakes, most notably Lake Powell and Flaming Gorge. The ski resorts are significantly more accessible, and Utah's terrain is tough-to-beat, although I will say that I love me some Jackson Hole. I've skied hundreds of days in Colorado, but always find myself yearning for the opportunity to ski either of the resorts up Little Cottonwood Canyon. The mountain biking opportunities (Moab), etc., are also plentiful.... All for now!

 

[wmr89]

It sounds like you've received your answer given the epiphany, but it would have been interesting to hear from somebody who isn't a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, who attended BYU.... Lots of opinions from folks that haven't been there done that. Perhaps, we should ask Ty Detmer to join the forum, but he has since converted, which very well may have happened while he attended BYU. I personally applied but didn't get accepted into BYU's finance program. I ended up at the University of Utah, and was very satisfied with Utah's program.

Detmer is a big hunter, I'm sure he would enjoy Rokslide!

 

[brsnow]

It sounds like you've received your answer given the epiphany, but it would have been interesting to hear from somebody who isn't a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, who attended BYU.... Lots of opinions from folks that haven't been there done that. Perhaps, we should ask Ty Detmer to join the forum, but he has since converted, which very well may have happened while he attended BYU. I personally applied but didn't get accepted into BYU's finance program. I ended up at the University of Utah, and was very satisfied with Utah's program.

Utah is a great place... I've lived in Colorado, for the past 17+ years, and there are A LOT of things that I miss about Utah, but those things are primarily centered around recreation (not education). I certainly prefer the hunting opportunities that CO has to offer, but given that I slant toward archery, those opportunities are only plentiful for a couple of months out of the year. For the other 9-10 months of the year, Utah is quite enticing: Way more water sport opportunities, given a multitude of lakes, most notably Lake Powell and Flaming Gorge. The ski resorts are significantly more accessible, and Utah's terrain is tough-to-beat, although I will say that I love me some Jackson Hole. I've skied hundreds of days in Colorado, but always find myself yearning for the opportunity to ski either of the resorts up Little Cottonwood Canyon. The mountain biking opportunities (Moab), etc., are also plentiful.... All for now!

What about Jim McMahon, he went there as well.

 

[fencesitter]

Great Call brsnow! He'd certainly have some good/interesting stories to share!

 

[2rocky]

As someone who attended an out of State school and has 2 college age daughters I've learned this in 25 years:


I think you gave your daughter the ability and the desire to make good decisions. No matter the university she attends those opportunities will be present.

Every university is a Party school if you want to party.

Every school has a religious community to become a part of. And equal access to all denominations.

I'd recommend visiting in the winter. Especially if she enjoys Southern CA winters.

Family in proximity to the kids university tend to not have as much contact with the student as they initially expect. Kids develop their own social circle at school and it takes over. Part of becoming independent adults.

Most nursing programs are upper division and graduate level. the first two years in basic sciences and core classes will help define your daughter's direction and will be a good base for any advanced science study.

Tour and visit on your own as many campuses as possible. meet with professors. You will get a FEEL for the campus vibe.

All college campuses are liberal by nature. It comes with the territory.

Check out the Greek community and the benefits of finding the right built in network. Also check out the dorms and see what opportunities they have . If you are going to do an off campus apartment you might as well spend the first 2 years at a JC.

 

[String&stick]

The policy on civil weddings has changed, so no one has to miss their daughters wedding.

Ah good to know, good friend and his parents missed his sister's wedding (part of it anyway) but that was 10 years ago or so.

Don't have anything against LDS, just things to consider if sending kids to college, thank you for correcting me on this as I was unaware of the changes.

 

[2ski]

Mom and dad will have to approve. We won't force her to go someplace she doesn't want to and won't disapprove of places or careers that we don't think are ideal for her. We ultimately want her to be happy and independent. We won't allow her to go to some school and not apply herself. If she insists on a college and or career that we think is bad for her, we will talk with her. Ultimately, we want her to understand what's she's getting herself into and we will not support her forever. She needs to understand careers, the pay, the benefits, the downsides. She does say she wants to make a lot of money and live in a beach house. I tried to persuade her of wanting materialistic things.

Well you didn't do so hot raising her if she likes materialistic things.....

 

[Billinsd]

Well you didn't do so hot raising her if she likes materialistic things.....

Yes, I'm not bragging. I'm still working with her.

 

[roadrunner]

The problem with too many materialistic things is the closer you get to being one paycheck away from bankruptcy...

 

[brsnow]

Yes, I'm not bragging. I'm still working with her.

Nothing wrong with working hard to own and appreciate nice things.

 

[brsnow]

The problem with too many materialistic things is the closer you get to being one paycheck away from bankruptcy...

No doubt,no reason to own a rifle that cost more then $500...

 

[Hunting4life]

BYU is a great school but if you’re not LDS I think it would be really hard for her to go and be accepted at BYU. The Mormon faith has lots of judge mental people and if you don’t believe their way they cast you out (speaking from experience). The UofU is also a great school. Still has lots of Mormons but it’s not shoved down your throat. I’ve had many friends go to both schools and all were pretty happy with their education. But if you’re not Mormon I wouldn’t go to BYU. On another note, if you ever do decide to make a move to Utah message me I’m a top Realtor here and I’d love to help you and your family out. Best of luck to you and your daughter on this decision.

 

[Kimber7man]

No doubt,no reason to own a rifle that cost more then $500...