Ha Ha Ha - Joke!

[ElkNut1]

I just had a Physical with my Doctor, he said don't eat anything Fatty, I said you mean like Bacon or Burgers, he said no 'Fatty' don't eat ANYTHING! Ha Ha!


ElkNut

 

[Trumpkin The Dwarf]

Can we turn this into a running joke thread? I need something to pass the next few days.

 

[ElkNut1]

Ha Ha, go ahead, it could get funny & help you & others to pass the day!

ElkNut

 

[Trumpkin The Dwarf]

Alright then! How does a trapper know he's caught a blond coyote?











It's chewed off three legs and it's still stuck in the trap...

 

[TBoschma]

One that my little boy loves:


what do you call a sleeping bull?






A bulldozer!

 

[bsnedeker]

An old man is applying for a job at a large company. During the interview the hiring manager asks "What is your biggest weakness?"

The old man quickly answers, "Honesty".

The hiring manager looks at him and says "I don't really think honesty is a weakness."

Old man says "Well, I don't give a shit what you think."

 

[ElkNut1]

LOL!!!!

 

[Geewhiz]

How do you hide an elephant in a strawberry patch?

You paint it's toenails red.

How you ever seen an elephant in a strawberry patch?

Works pretty good then doesn't it!

 

[BDRam16]

Biden.

That’s it. That’s my joke.

 

[Geewhiz]

Did you hear about the guy that got a job at the zoo circumcising elephants?

The pay wasn't great but he got HUGE tips.

 

[Billy Goat]

I once ran into a couple of Wyoming residents hunting mule deer in Colorado. It was a little after lunch, I was going up to a glassing spot for the afternoon to look around, they were coming out dragging a deer by the back legs. I conversed with them a little, told them in my experience they drug better pulling by the rack.


To my surprise I came up on them on my way back in the evening. I said well, I always thought they pulled better from the front, maybe I was wrong? The less winded of the two said, oh hell yeah, it pulls easier! But we sure are getting a lot further from the ******* truck!

 

[robby denning]

Bwahahahahah


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[rclouse79]

I guess I will share my go to:

What kind of bees make milk?


Booo-bees

 

[Vaultman]

I entered 10 puns into a contest to see which one would win...
No pun in ten did.

 

[Opah]

why did the Cat sleep on the road ?
It got tired!

 

[5MilesBack]

I just had a Physical with my Doctor, he said don't eat anything Fatty, I said you mean like Bacon or Burgers, he said no 'Fatty' don't eat ANYTHING! Ha Ha!

I'd find a new doctor, or just stop going at all.

 

[NateK]

Did you know diarrhea is hereditary?

It runs the jeans...

 

[ThisIsMyHandle]

When’s the worst time to have a heart attack?

During a game of charades, no one will help you.


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[540-Virginian]

I went to the doc to get a check up the other day. All seemed to be going well and good. But then he asked me to drop my drawers and turn around… wasnt expecting a prostate exam as Im pretty young… but whatever, i complied and then his finger was shoved so far up my ass it made my nose run.

what i really want to know is


should i get different dentist?

 

[Finch]

The only one I can think of.

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall?

Damn

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