You aren't lying about being in Michigan... I have things I ordered 2 weeks ago that are still delayed and likely wont get here until after Christmas...I can mail you one today. But this close to season all delivery dates are a crap shoot and not guaranteed. It will depend on your regional hubs throughput and your carrier workload.
I live in SC. These dudes are broke. I get stuff quick because the workload isn't that much higher than expected. Broke people don't order stuff.
You live in TX. I'm told you guys aren't broke and most are paid pretty well. I'm sure your area's order volume is much much higher.
If you lived in MI you would be screwed. Their distros in Detroit are always ******. Since everything goes through there a stupid delay gets added once it hits that stage.
Hope this makes sense. You might be SOL